Lets continue our journey towards being self awared. Today we will look behavioural self-awareness & awareness about locus of control:
Behavioural Self-Awareness
Our behaviour is another important area of our life where we need to
build up awareness. A number of traits and habits constitute our character and
personality. We may be, as Bishop (2002) notes, active, passive, aggressive or
even manipulative in our behaviour. Individuals who are active, when confronted
with problems, would rise to the occasion and make things happen rather than
wait listlessly for things to happen. They are active, agile and proactive.
Conversely, people who are self-conscious and shy, tend to be passive. And the
reserved nature of the passive tends to repel rather than attract. Hence they
fail to influence others in their favour. Some others might cease to respect
them, restrict or even end all contact with them. The passivity of the passive
would lower their own self-esteem and make them ashamed of themselves. As a
result, depression may set in and their confidence might decline.
Quite a few of us may be aggressive in our behaviour. Aggression,
incidentally, can only beget aggression and provoke hostility. Aggressiveness
can even get out of control, invariably resulting in strained relationships.
Aggression can also produce resentment or bring about non-cooperation. As
Bishop (2002) observes, it can make the other person angry, feel hurt and
humiliated and, becoming demotivated, get on to the defensive. Aggression can
also badly affect the aggressor. It can cause fluctuations in blood pressure,
make you feel disgusted with your self besides lowering your self-esteem and
causing indigestion and ulcers.
Apart from being passive, active or aggressive, some of us can be
manipulative in our behaviours. They generally influence others in terms of
meeting their selfish ends. Now, no one can cheat others all the time. Before
long the truth would be out and people will know who exactly such people are
and with the dawning of this realization people would not trust them anymore.
Hence, there is a need to know where we stand with regard to our behaviour. We
need to reflect on and identify the behaviour with which we are content and
that which needs to be improved. We need to be alert and self-critical if we
really wish to improve ourselves. We need to eliminate or rather replace those
aspects of our behaviour which we think are harmful and build up those that can
lead to success and accomplishments.
There are several positive qualities and traits that, if picked up, can
do us good. We can be affectionate yet firm in our attitude, active yet
composed, careful, creditable and decisive, democratic yet discreet in our
dealings with others, fair, flexible, influential, loving, respectable,
sincere, sociable, tolerant, understanding, friendly, generous, independent,
reliable, unselfish and so on. These are qualities that are desirable and can
therefore be retained and nourished. Conversely, we can be argumentative,
autocratic, boastful, disagreeable, hostile, mean, harsh, rash, rigid, or
aloof, dishonest, dependent, hesitant, possessive, self-centred, shy,
submissive, wasteful, and withdrawn. These are negative qualities that can have
quite a debilitating effect on our relationships. They can stand in the way of
our progress and accomplishments.
Hence we need to think of situations where we experience the negative
aspects of our personality. We need to spend time thinking in terms of changing
the negatives to positives. We need to know ourselves not only for our own sake
but also to be able to relate effectively to people around us.
Awareness about locus of control
The locus of control in our life is yet another area about which we need
to build up awareness. A person s perception as to the source of his or her
fate is called Locus of control. It is the degree to which people believe they
are the masters of their own destiny. Depending upon people's belief as to the
source or location of control of their life, they can be classified into two
groups, namely (i) internals and (ii) externals.
Some people believe they are masters of their own fate. They are
responsible for their success or failure in life. Such people who believe that
they contro1 what happens to them are called internals. People with this belief
have the conviction that they are responsible for their own growth and
development. They do not wait and waste their time trusting in stars and luck
to shower their blessings. They take responsibility for their own choices. They
think before they act. They bounce back when something bad happens. They do not
feel rejected and dejected when things go amiss. They generally think of
alternative ways of making things happen. They focus on things they can do
something about and do not worry about things which are beyond their reach or
control. They do not break their head by beating it against a brick wall when
confronted with failure. They accept reality and strive to find out ways and means
to get out of their setbacks.
Unlike the internals, the externals believe that what happens to them
is controlled by outside forces such as stars, luck or chance. They act as if
they are pawns of fate or puppets in the hands of destiny. The externals get
irritated easily and keep on whining and complaining. They are ever unwilling
to take up responsibility for any failure on their part, putting as they do the
blame on others or on luck, destiny, whatever! When the projects they take up
fail owing to their own lack of concern or competence, they put the blame on
either lack of money or support from others. They put their blame on the
teachers who taught them, the parents who brought them up and even the stars
under which they were born. As for themselves, they consider themselves always
blame free and in no way accountable for what they do in their lives.
Available research, as Blau (1987) points out, reveals that externals
are less satisfied with their jobs and account for a higher rate of absenteeism
than internals. They are also more alienated from the work setting and less
involved on their jobs than are internals. Internals, unlike externals, are
also found to have their health substantially under their control, firmly
believing as they do that taking due responsibility for their health and
forming better health habits is of prime importance to their overall wellbeing.
And so it is that they are generally found to be remaining healthier.
Consequently low incidence of sickness and absenteeism are also reported among
them.
Evidently, as Robbins (2003) notes, internals generally perform better
on their jobs, search more actively for information before making a decision,
are more motivated to achieve, and make a greater attempt to control their
environment and its effects.
Internals are also found to be doing well on sophisticated tasks that
require complex information processing and learning. In addition, internals are
also found more suited to jobs that require initiative and independence of
action. In contrast, externals are found to be doing well on jobs that are well
structured and routine and in which success depends on complying with the
direction of others.
By now you are quite familiar with the qualities and traits that go
with both the internals and the externals. Against the background of this
awareness, you can now decide whether or not you want to be with the internals
or the externals. Take a decision in this respect and bring about the needed
adjustment in your belief and take control of your life.
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